I was at the Weekend Australian Art Melbourne swilling as much free champagne as I could carry when I walked past a painting of Shane Warne. This wasn’t just any one-of-500 limited edition prints being slung by Wide World of Sports, this was a bigger-than-lifesize painting of Warnie bowling an undoubtedly deadly delivery at some off-picture opponent. I couldn’t help but remark “damn I’d love that in my living room” (meaning, of course, “how tacky is that, you’d have to pay me to take it”). My man Prontoid immediately suggested that it’d be far preferable to have an actual stuffed Warnie in one’s living room.

As long as he was properly cleaned, preserved and mounted, I’d have to say Prontoid was probably right. This got me wondering – is it actually legal to stuff a person (once they’re dead of course) and hang them up somewhere around the house? As usual, it was Captain Internet to the rescue – but I couldn’t turn up a lot of information about stuffing people until I came across this article in the Phoenix New Times. After a bit more digging it turned out that the article, while hilarious, seems to be a hoax. So for now I have to conclude that it’s probably not legal, and regardless would be pretty tough to find someone to actually do the job.

While obtaining a stuffed sports star’s corpse seems to be out of the question for the moment, it seems that a German bloke called Gunther von Hagens has developed a technique for preserving human tissue called plastination. He’s used this technique to construct Body Worlds, essentially an exhibition of corpses, which he tours through Europe and Asia. It’d be nice to see some Aussie representation in there – maybe a tasteful exhibit of the Moran family sitting down to dinner or something. I’ll be keeping an eye on developments.

End note: a Google search for Shane Warne initially turned up http://www.shanewarne.com, but visiting the actual site returned a 404 error. I wonder what the deal is there?

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